when i got home from school, after a nightmare drive home in horrible traffic, i checked my email. i had emailed an advisor in the biology department attempting to solve my problems, and she replied. what it comes down to is that the rules are the rules. it says on the website, in an obscure and easily overlooked location, that 6 of the 9 advanced hours have to be taken here at uofh. so in the end i have to take 3 more hours of biology...boooooo. so i found a class that is before my political science class on t/th to take. its human genetics, not that i am interested in ANOTHER semester of genetics (this will be the 3rd so i should be an expert), the only other two classes offered were no-go's. one was evolutionary biology (another class i had already taken at tech), but the professor taught part of my genetics class here at uofh and was a terrible, terrible professor. the other was neuroscience with a professor whose name i could not pronounce, and i felt that for a subject about the brain i would need to have a professor whose name i could pronounce in order to understand the class. so, as long as uofh doesnt throw anymore boomerangs at me, i will still be graduating in december. hopefully i can handle the earlier class and being away from karsen for 7 hours without having a complete breakdown. oh, and hopefully i pass the class. the others will be easy.
today has really been horrendous, from the problems with uofh to the traffic i faced on my drive home. i just want to curl up in the fetal position, cry, sleep, and be left alone. but i am a mommy, so doing those things is impossible. it was about 20 minutes until karsen's bedtime when the best thing that happened today happened. he was sitting on my lap cuddling and i just realized that matt and i created the most wonderful baby boy in the world. i have known this for quite sometime, but it just really dawned on me at that time and made me smile (the first thing all day). i just cannot express how much i love my son. i realize that i need to make myself realize (redundant, i know) that he is what i am doing all of this for. i am finishing my degree so that i can make a better future for him. he is my most precious gift. when he was sitting on my lap, cuddling with mommy, i could just feel how content he was and i was. it seemed that, just for a split second, everything was going to be okay and all was right with the world. its amazing the power of love from a baby is, just everything it makes a mommy realize. everything i do is for that little boy, every decision i make. i laid him down to bed and he went right to sleep. i dont know how i am going to handle adding 2 more hours away from him to my schedule, as i can barely handle it now and its only 5 hours, but hopefully we will make it. i just wish that i didnt have to drive the truck.
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3 comments:
tears are streaming down my face as i read the emotion of the words you have expressed in this blog..you are under such pressure now that is probably the most intense one can have......you are a wonderul mother and you are so right in the realization of the most perfect gift you have brought into this world by the grace of God and that blessing is Karsen....God is guiding you and paving your path ss i see it, by making a way for you to graduate in december......i know the truck is difficult to drive and i wish my car was there for you to use...but you are going to make it and i am continually praying for you, Matthew and for precious Karsen and for you --just you--by yourself in my prayers too....i love you, Ramona,,,you are a blessing in so many lives...jk
I do not know you. And this post is old. But I must say that I 100% agree with your post and that UH is the worst school ever, does not care for tis students, and there is way to much BS students have to deal with. I must say though that I am glad you looked at the brighter picture of your son.
I just happen to google "I hate university of houston" and your blog came up as one of the choices. I support your disdain for this institution. I was in one of their professional programs several years ago (pharmacy). I was placed in academic suspension for failing to meet gpa requirements at the end of my second year. I subsequently appealed for readmission was denied eventhough I presented the proper documentation to support reasons as to why I would like to come back and the academic progress I have made--I enrolled in a graduate program in UHCL and was making straight A's. They weren't impressed with that, long story short, they denied me. I was very depressed at the time but recovered from it. To this day, I hold a grudge against that university. Lots of practicing pharmacists from that school cheated to get to where they are. I didn't. I know the administration is aware of the rampant and prevalent cheating in that school and they have never done anything about it. I personally know some of these graduates and they are dumbasses. I know your frustration all too well.
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